The Candy Plan
Each Hallowe’en has brought with it a struggle over candy – particularly, its consumption by my six-year-old son, who is allergic to preservatives. I remember the first Hallowe’en when my son realized that by simply getting dressed up and mumbling a few magic words, he would be given candy. He was only more surprised by his mom telling him that he could actually eat the candy, even though he was given it by a stranger. My plan so far has been to limit how much candy he ate. The scratchy skin and bad behaviour were just hallmarks of the first week of November.
My old plan consisted of him dumping his booty bag on the floor, and us sorting it into what he could not eat, and what he could eat in moderation. I then rationed his “could eat in moderation” pile by letting him have a couple pieces a day, so his system would not be overloaded with preservatives. I chose to ignore the fact that low levels of preservatives over time are probably just as detrimental to his health as a sudden, short overload. Obviously, denial has been my friend in parenting in many regards.
This year is different because I feel he is old enough to start taking responsibility for his allergies. He needs to learn that he must monitor his own food intake. By doing so, he should get a firmer understanding of the cause and effect of eating certain foods, and I can change from being a warden to a supervisor. My vision is of a child who willingly eats his vegetables and turns down anything that is blue, other than blueberries. By controlling what my son eats, I have inadvertently elevated the status of junk food in his eyes. If he could find them, he would probably paper the walls of his room with posters of chips, pop and candy.
I’ve had some success this fall with getting him to connect eating well with being strong and healthy. More food and healthy drinks have been going into him, and now that Hallowe’en is coming up, it seems like a good time to rethink how I have approached sweets with him. Also, while I was looking on the internet for easy costume and decorating ideas, I came across the idea of having a candy plan. This is when you decide ahead of time how you will approach the consumption of the candy your kids will bring home. The key seems to be letting them know about it ahead of time, and letting them have a say in the guidelines. When I approached my son to develop a candy plan, I was nervous. My son would eat only junk food if he had his way, and itchiness be damned. However, I framed it as a health and moderation issue, and much to my surprise, he was able to have a mature discussion about it. This may be because he did not have a pile of candy in front of him, the smell of sugar and the brightly-coloured wrappers speaking to him louder than I ever could. Together we came up with a candy plan: he would eat whatever candy he wants on Hallowe’en night, and then he trades in whatever is left for something he has had his eye on for a long time: a Star Wars-style light saber.
I have my doubts as to his ability to stick to the plan the morning after Hallowe’en, but hopefully we’ll both keep up our resolve, the candy will be passed on to those who want it, and I will have made some more progress in getting my son to manage his own allergies.
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Great idea – candy plan!! The sooner kids can take responsibility for their own health, allergies, etc., the better!